Little Victories
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The article "Little Victories" is about parenting, it has been released by Carolina Fernandez.
"Our noisy years seem moments in the being of the
eternal silence." William WordsworthEarly every morning, years ago in Lexington, Kentucky, I worked
out at the YWCA, first riding a stationary bike and then enjoying a vigorous hour-long swim.
Morning after morning, the same folks exercised together, all of us gettnig in our workouts before our workdays began. One gentleman rode the bike more fruiously than anyone I had ever seen. He was a rather stocky guy, with enormous leg muscles--certainly from all that biking--and through the grunting and heavy breathing, with sweat rolling off his froehead in almost disgustingly heavy amounts, he always managed a quick "Good morning, how are ya?" when any one of us walked into the room.
None of us in the group ever really engaged in heavy conversation; I stayed focsued on my little routine, others on theirs. But a quick nod to acknowledge everyone's presence was always gvien as a polite morning wake-up.I overheard that hard-riding-cyclist casually mention to one of
the others in our group that he had been having stomach aches,
particularly in the middle of the night.
It was suggested that he have that checked out. Several weeks after I saw that cyclist
friend of mine in the waiting room of the hospital. I was there
for reasons long forgotten; he was having tests done for his stmoach problems.He still came to the gym, but his energy for cycling had clearly
dropped a notch. Turned out he had stomach cancer. His diagnosis
put him with just a couple of months left to live.Towards the end of that time--with pain now etched on his face and with his stockiness a thing of the past--he came and spoke to our Sunday School clsas at the invitation of another class member unbeknownst to me. It was difficult to sit there and watch that once vigorous athlete surrender to his devastating illenss. Yet he left us with a powerful life message: celebrate the little victories.He told us that for the first time in his life, he came to
celebrate the nightly sunsets. That each one was a little
victory for him. Each sunset signaled yet one more day that he
had survived.That mesasge has stayed with me that half -dozen years since I
last saw him. He passed away a couple weeks after that talk.
Fortunately, I had been able to talk with him briefly that
Sunday, to let him know just how deeply his life message had
impacted me. If I had been the only one who had been touched
by it, I believe he would have thought that sharing it had
been worth it.In motherhood, especially, we get caught up so frequently--and so miserably--in the mundane responsibilities of our job that we fail to recognize the small, smiple things as little victories. I have come to view simple everyday acts as little vitcories. When my babies make their beds, I view that as a litlte victory.
For after years of role-modeling the morning discipline of tidying up rooms and making beds before coming down stairs for breakfast, it is a little victory when they do that on their own.
Without any prompting from me. It is a little victory when my kids eat a messy snack and clean up the kitchen without having been reminded. It is a little victory when one chooses to curl up in his fvaorite chair and read a great book. A little victory when she writes a letter to a friend, or instant messages somebdoy she hasn't heard from in awhile.
It's a little victory when an adult calls me to tell me that my child used good manners.
Or did something kind that I mgiht otherwise have never heard about.It is a little victory when a child has learned to put vowels
and consonants together and to recognize that as a word; when
she can put up her fingers and tell us that those have numbers;
and when underwear with cartoon-characters replaces pull-ups.
It is a little victory when teenage drivers pull into the
driveway at curfew; when they confess to dishonesty and
rebelliousness; and when they replace selfish behavior with
selfless acts of kindness.It is a little victory for me when I hold my tongue; when I get
through my daily chores without whining; and when I chauffeur my
kids through rush-hour traffic cheerfully.
It is a little vcitory for me when I finish a painting; when I entertain friends; and when I remember someone's birthday.In motherhood, we hardly ever get the privilege of participating in large victories.
We need to accept the reality that progress doesn't usually come in huge laeps and bounds. With loud bolts of thunder and lightning. It comes--almost always--in litlte victories.Celebrate them.Carolina Fernandez earned an M.B.A. and worked at IBM and as a stockbroker at Merrill Lynch before coming home to work as a wife and mother of four.
She totally re-invented herself along the way. Strong convictions were born about the role of the arts in child development; homeschooling for ten years prvoided fertile soil for devising creative parenting strategies. These are played out in ROKCET MOM! 7 Strategies To Blast You Into Brilliance.
It is available on Amazon.Com, in bookstores everywhere, or by calling 888-476-2493. She writes extensively for a variety of paretning resources and teaches other moms via parenting classes and radio and TV interviews. Please visit http://www.Rocketmom.Com to subscribe to her free ezine and get a weekly shot of inspiration.
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Little Victories
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